Online Dating Site & Free Dating Sites

Just a few years ago internet dating sites and free dating sites in New Zealand were considered, by some, to be an embarrassment; something only the desperately lonely would resort to, but not now; online internet dating and free dating sites are now very much hot property. The first thing I learned in my research about using an online dating site was how plentiful social matching sites and free dating sites are. I separated the vast number of online dating sites into categories using a criteria which is paramount to me; their cost including free dating sites.

 I decided to register with one of the few free sites, www.Cupid.com, just to see what this whole thing was about. I answered five simple questions about myself and within 24 hours I was reminded of a lesson Mother had taught me as a child regarding everything from shoes to cheese; you get what you pay for. The three responses I received made me feel like an offering on a menu board at a brothel.

A change of strategy was called for. I decided to try the other end of the dating site spectrum,

www.eharmony.com. Created by a psychologist specializing in relationships, e*Harmony boasts a 97% success rate. Without even knowing the cost, I set out on answering their 500 (yes, 500!) question survey which is required in order to receive any more information.

After more than two grueling hours of soul searching and choice making I was informed that I was

unsuitable for matching at this time. It seems they do not lend their services to those with my marital status of separated.

What confused, and annoyed, me was the fact that they offered separated as one choice on their drop down menu somewhere back around question number five. Why would they have me go through 495 more questions knowing I was ineligible? Could it be the plethora of advertising I was subjected to whilst navigating the humongous questionnaire?

I finally settled on a dating site which could be considered middle-of-the-road in both price and

quality. They don`t scrutinize every person who wants to contact me the way e*Harmony claims to operate. They do, however, require these gentlemen to have a profile of their own which I can view to make my own decision. They also must pay a fee for being a part of the group.

I`m only one week into my introductory 30-day membership and I`ve already received somewhere in the neighborhood of a dozen requests to get to know me better. Granted, there are bad apples in every bunch and the clod who wrote me an E-mail gushing over my profile claiming we were perfect for each other but cautioned me not to respond if I weighed in at all over 63 kilograms (140 pounds) is probably not an anomaly, but hopefully not a good example of the majority either.

I have received a few very intelligent and even charming inquiries as well. I am carefully considering those. The beauty of online dating sites is you can take your time in deciding who you want to communicate with. You also have control over what medium is used. You can choose E-mail, Instant Messaging, telephone calls or even chance a face-to-face meeting, if and when you are ready. You can even politely decline with the click of a mouse without the awkwardness that comes from telling Auntie Julia`s neighbor that her son in the socks and sandals is not really your type.

Whether you are using a free site like www.nz.co.nz/ or a subscription based service like www.nzdating.com or www.findsomeone.co.nz, I think the things to keep in mind are to be careful, be safe, and be realistic. If you don`t find your ideal mate, so what? Did you have fun searching?

by Crystal Stango

Living in New Jersey but in love with New Zealand - internet dating nz

February 2005 (c)